Software almost always charges one person for a private upgrade, but the things worth paying for in a group are jointly held. A reflection on why the unit of payment should be the relationship, not the individual.
I added stories to a friendship app, then spent longer than I'd admit trying not to copy the version everyone already has. Here's what I changed, and the objection I couldn't engineer away.
Colloquies used to encrypt every circle end-to-end by default. After watching four senior engineer friends get tangled in their own keys, I changed the default. Here's the reasoning, and the line I tried to hold.
We wrote two posts arguing against streaks. We're adding one anyway. A reflection on the difference between an engagement trick and a small, honest nudge — and where we tried to draw the line.
In university my circle kept collapsing back to four, and Robin Dunbar's research suggests that's not a coincidence. On why real intimacy has a ceiling, and why the gatherings that matter still run on a small-group engine even when the crowd is big.
Social media is built like a town square. A reflection on why the relationships that matter happen somewhere else, and what a digital living room could actually look like.
Most apps with the word friend in the copy are engagement apps in disguise. A reflection on what software built for friendship would actually look like — and why ritual matters more than reach.
Most apps are built to win your attention. What if one were built to hand it back? A reflection on software that serves the relationship, not the session.
Thoughtful essays on connection, friendship, and building deeper relationships. No spam, unsubscribe anytime.
